Hello reader,
I spilled all the tea on Threads recently, so in the spirit of openness, truth and transparency, I thought I should post it here as well in case anyone was curious about who I really am.
Penn Owen Hurst is my writer’s persona. A pen name. If you don’t know, a pen name is simply an assumed name used by a writer instead of their real name.
Until I began writing fiction, I never understood why a person would not want to publish their book with their real name. Now I get it. Not all authors do it for this reason, but for me, it is a self-defense mechanism. It gives me freedom to be myself without the real me being in the spotlight. I want my stories to be what people focus on, not me.
I really have social media to thank for this. It wrecked me.
I was on nearly all the social platforms, Facebook, Twitter (now X), Reddit, Instagram, Threads and more. I had thousands of followers, but the addiction and toxicity became so oppressive it drove me deep into depression so bad I was considering suicide. Thank god I had the sense to realize it, and the support of my loving husband. I had to get out to save my own life. I have enough trauma to last ten lifetimes and my socials were just making it worse. So, about two years ago I deleted all of my accounts. I have been scraping myself from the internet ever since. It's tedious, but I need the anonymity to keep my sanity.
I'm deliberately being slow and cautious about working my way back to social media. I’m only on Threads because there is a large community of writers there. By creating connection with other writers and authors, I can learn things I need to become a better writer.
I've suffered from Agoraphobia most of my life and it has turned me into a recluse, so taking classes or joining in-person writing groups is pretty much out of the question. But, being Penn, in a way, allows me to do that online.
I'm new to writing anything longer than 1000-2000 word articles. I have only began to put in a serious effort about a year ago.
I took up writing fiction as a way to process my trauma. Each of my stories and characters is all of me on the page. The feelings, the actions, and personalities of my characters, each represent an aspect of my reality. My trauma. My lived experiences.
They say (whoever 'they' is) write what you know, so that's what I do. I write gritty, true-to-life, character-driven stories, that focus on outsiders finding (or keeping) their true love and lasting genuine human connection. They either overcome, or find healthy ways to cope with their traumas. My stories are YA and NA focused because most of my trauma is rooted there.
I created Penn Owen Hurst to give me the freedom I need to be unencumbered, one hundred percent myself with people in my writing. That tiny bit of separation makes me feel safe to express my genuine self. My therapist told me that writing would help me process trauma. I didn't believe him. But, I tried, and failed time and again. I was too afraid someone would find my journal and see the real me. The me that was hiding behind the facade of an outgoing, happy, well-adjusted person. When in truth, I am a very damaged person who cries a lot and just wants to hide in a dark cave and not be looked at. I’m not looked at a what society says a man should be.
So, writing "I did this" or "this happened to me", those graphic details just made me live them all over again and again. So it was really having the opposite affect is was supposed to. But writing fiction; putting my thoughts and traumas into my stories is genuine therapy that heals. It helps to lift the burden I've been carrying for the past forty odd years.
I am not under any delusions that I will become a truly successful author, (I'm defining successful as being able live off the income of my book sales), like Stephen King, getting a book deal or movie adaptations. That is just a fantasy. Those odds are on par with winning a billion dollar lottery. So being Penn, and publishing as Penn Owen Hurst wouldn't hurt. And besides, Penn Owen Hurst is a much cooler name than my real one, trust me, so you aren't really missing anything.
Warm regards,
Penn Owen Hurst